Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Republican Incompetence

Cheney shoots senior citizen, covers it up: Vice President Dick “The Shooter” Cheney finally comes clean; he believed the man he shot was al Qaeda terrorist Ahman al-Zawahiri who had infiltrated the quail hunting party. Cheney confessed to Fox News Brit Hume that the winged hunter was actually his close friend Harry Whittington, a 78 year old millionaire lawyer. Senior citizen! Lawyer!!

Cheney blamed the mix-up on faulty intelligence. "I believed I had credible intelligence that al-Zawahiri had infiltrated my hunting party in disguise with the intent of spraying me with pellets," Mr. Cheney told reporters. "Only after I shot Harry in the face and he shouted 'Cheney, you bastard' did I realize that this intelligence was faulty."

A DOD spokesman announced that as a result of Mr Cheney's accurate shooting, he would be awarded the Army's Basic Marksman Medal. And at the White House, President George W. Bush defended his vice president's shooting of a fellow hunter, saying that the attack sent a strong message to terrorists everywhere. If Dick Cheney is willing to shoot an innocent American citizen at point-blank range, imagine what he'll do to terrorists!!

But the main stream media was having none of it. Washington Post columnist David Ignatius opines that "arrogance of power is on display with the Bush administration," and compares the Veep's hunting accident to Ted Kennedy’s Chappaquiddick:
“Nobody died at Armstrong Ranch, but this incident reminds me a bit of Senator Edward Kennedy's delay in informing Massachusetts authorities about his role in the fatal automobile accident at Chappaquiddick in 1969.

Did Ted have a little problem at Chappaquiddick? Hmmm...

And the White House press corps is outraged that Cheney waited 20 hours or so to disclose the incident. Don't these Bush people understand that the cover-up is worse than the crime? West Wing producer Larry O’Donnell demanded to know whether the Vice President was drunk. Larry's a fake reporter just like the White House press corps.

Bush Fails to Prevent East Coast Blizzard, Minorities Hit Hardest: As President Bush and his staff cowered in the White House, the snow continued to pile up on the many poor and African American victims who could not afford to get out of town or to safety in Florida. Crucial supplies of blankets, hot cocoa, popcorn and dark rum - so essential to surviving the stress of any major snowstorm - lay in stores undelivered.

"Where is the government? I need my sidewalk shoveled so I can get out to buy my lottery tickets" said one D.C. resident from his living room. "Why are we wasting money in Iraq when we could be spending it here on me?"

Howard Dean has suggested he will call for an investigation once his new medications kick in and John Kerry took a break from the sporting activities of the glamorous super-rich in some exotic locale to call for new legislation outlawing snowstorms. "The Republican Congress has dropped the ball once again. I have always been a staunch supporter of anti-snow legislation, except for certain locations where I ski. Snow has no business on our roads and the President and Congress knows that."


Blogger pappy said...

That was some funny stuff. I needed a smile today.

1:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is priceless! Your line, “A DOD spokesman announced that as a result of Mr Cheney's accurate shooting, he would be awarded the Army's Basic Marksman Medal. “ reminded me though: I don’t ever recall reading anywhere whether or not the Veep got the quail he was shooting at.

I was quail hunting two weeks ago and only bagged two, but I also didn’t shoot anyone I was hunting with.

Separate note, but hunting-related: I was duck hunting this past Saturday and a Mallard was flying at 12:00 right for my blind. I fired and hit him, and was watching him come down and then I realized he was heading right for me! A 5 lb duck coming down at 30 mph can really put you in a hurt locker if he hits you. I ducked (no pun intended) into the blind and braced for the impact; he landed ONE FOOT from me! All I could think of was what a field day the PETA people would have had the duck hit me.

This is a strange year for me for hunting: did I tell you about my Colorado deer hunt in October? (One shot – two deer)


3:38 PM  
Blogger Bill Lama said...

I could see the headline: "Special Opps Colonel felled by CA Mallard." Now that would be priceless.

And what about "one shot - two deer"? That Marine marksman medal must be really something!


3:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mission Accomplished!!!!

Gunmen strike 27 Baghdad mosques, kill imams
Violence follows destruction of historic Shiite shrine

Wednesday, February 22, 2006; Posted: 4:45 p.m. EST (21:45 GMT)

Iraqis walk past the Al-Askariya Mosque, damaged by the blast Wednesday.

Blast destroys mosque dome (1:51)

How violence affects everyday life in Iraq (2:40)

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Gunmen targeted 27 Baghdad mosques and killed three Sunni imams Wednesday in the wake of a bomb attack at one of the holiest Shiite sites.

The wave of attacks followed an early morning bombing at the Al-Askariya "Golden Mosque" in Samarra. The strikes, involving small arms, rocket-propelled grenades and mortar rounds, all happened between 11 a.m. and 5 p.m., police said.

Three of the mosques were burned down, and in addition to the imams, three guards also were killed. One imam was kidnapped.

Security was beefed up around all mosques in Baghdad, police said, and Iraqi security forces across the country were placed on high alert. Officers on vacation or leave have been told to report for duty, police said.

The Iraqi Islamic Party, the largest Sunni party in Iraq, condemned all the violence and said Shiites had taken over Sunni mosques in the southern town of Diwaniya and arrested worshippers.

Meanwhile, gunmen stormed the party's southern Baghdad office, evacuated its employees and torched the building.

The largely Sunni insurgency has periodically targeted Shiite Arabs. Over the past year, Sunnis have accused the Shiite-led government of targeting them in raids.

Iraqi and U.S. leaders urged people to remain calm and united amid fears the sectarian violence could escalate into civil war, but a U.S. State Department spokesman said he believes the threat of civil war is overstated.

"There are forces seeking to prevent democracy and obstruct the peaceful political and economic development of Iraq," Adam Ereli said Wednesday at a news conference. "They seek to achieve their goals in a number of ways. But, as I said before, promoting sectarian violence is one of them. There's nothing new here."

Meanwhile, the top half of the golden dome that once towered above the Al-Askariya Mosque collapsed in the blast. Minarets flanking the dome remained standing amid mounds of debris. (Watch how the blast is intensifying tension -- 1:51)

The Samarra attack happened at 7 a.m., when gunmen dressed as Iraqi police commandos bombed the site, which has deep historical significance in Shiite Islam.

Shiites believe Imam al-Mehdi, the 12th and final awaited imam, will reappear at the Al-Askariya Mosque to bring them salvation.

Al-Mehdi is the son of Imam Hassan al-Askari, the 11th imam, who is buried in the shrine. His grandfather, the 10th imam, is also buried there.

Al-Mehdi is said to have disappeared in the eighth century during the funeral of his father and is believed by Shiites to have been withdrawn by God from the eyes of the people, until his return.

Salaheddin province, where the shrine is located, is home to a large Sunni population.

Residents of Baghdad said members of a militia loyal to Shiite cleric Muqtada al-Sadr were going door-to-door asking heads of household to swear they had nothing to do with the Samarra attack. Samarra is 70 miles (113 kilometers) north of Baghdad.

There were no immediate reports of injuries in the bombing, and 10 people -- all dressed as Iraqi police commandos -- have been arrested, according to Iraqi National Security Adviser Mowaffaq al-Rubaie.

Foreign fighters were likely responsible, and the attack bore the hallmarks of al Qaeda in Iraq, al-Rubaie said.

"They are really testing the patience of the Iraqi people," he said, calling on Muslims around the world to condemn "this act of terrorism."

The attack occurred as Kurdish, Shiite and Sunni leaders are working to form a national unity government.

Both Iraqi Prime Minister Ibrahim al-Jaafari, a Shiite, and President Jalal Talabani, a Kurd, said the attack was an effort to incite sectarian violence.

In a taped address on Iraqiya TV, al-Jaafari called on all Iraqi political parties to condemn the mosque attack and asked Sunni and Shiite Iraqis to demonstrate in Samarra.

Al-Jaafari also declared a three-day period of mourning and ordered the ministries of Defense and of Housing and Reconstruction to assess damage and begin rebuilding the shrine.

Talabani condemned the "horrendous crime," saying, "The perpetrators' aim is to start a civil war between Iraqis."

Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani, Iraq's most powerful Shiite cleric, called for a week of mourning and is expected to call for businesses to close in protest for three days, a spokesman said.

President Bush condemned the "brutal bombing of the Golden Mosque," promising help to rebuild it and asking Iraqis to exercise restraint.

"The terrorists in Iraq have again proven that they are enemies of all faiths and of all humanity," he said in a statement. "This senseless crime is an affront to people of faith throughout the world."

Peaceful protests, not violence, urged
Demonstrations against the bombing of the Al-Askariya Mosque were held across the country.

Following noon prayers, 4,000 demonstrators in Baghdad walked from al-Sadr's office toward a nearby mosque, a spokesman for his office said. By the time the march ended, the number of people had swelled to 10,000, the spokesperson said. It was one of several protests in Baghdad neighborhoods, according to Iraqi Emergency Police.

Al-Sadr cut short a visit to Lebanon and was returning to Iraq, where he was planning to make a televised statement. A senior spokesman for al-Sadr's movement urged "calm and patience" and said maintaining national unity is Iraq's top priority.

In Samarra, several hundred people gathered at the mosque and at the mayor's office, denouncing the Iraqi government and the U.S. military, authorities said. Thousands of protesters also took to the streets in Najaf, Kut and Karbala, police said.

Other developments

Just east of Salaheddin in Diyala province, gunmen killed two Iraqi police officers on their way to work in central Baquba and two companions of a judge on the outskirts of Muqtadiya. The judge was wounded.

A bomb killed 20 people and wounded 25 others at a marketplace in the southern Baghdad suburb of Dora on Tuesday afternoon, police said. (Full story)

Three Muslim men from the Middle East have been charged in the United States with plotting attacks against U.S. and coalition troops in Iraq and other countries. The three have pleaded not guilty. (Full story)

2:48 PM  

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