Thursday, August 24, 2006

John and Johnny

Here are my two favorite people whose names begin with John, my son John and my grandson Johnny Walton (Carolynne’s son). It was taken when Johnny visited San Francisco before shipping out for his second tour in Iraq. They are visiting the redwood trees in Muir Wood. These guys are such fun.

John sent me the following:

I was checking out the apartment and roommate sections of Craiglist and ran across this gem. Check out the last two sentences. For those of you not from San Francisco, I swear the person writing the ad was not making a joke.

Share spacious quiet 2-bedroom apartment in Bernal Heights with politically active 33-year old lesbian graduate student at S.F. State. Share kitchen, common space and 1/2 utilities. Sorry, no laundry facility on site, but there are laundromats nearby. Ample street parking. When I'm not at school I love yoga, going to the theater and occasionally having friends over for dinner. Month-to-month lease, 1st, last month's rent with $1000 deposit.

Please be open and tolerant.

No men, no meat, no Republicans, no TV, no smokers, no pets, no plants

John again: Here's another ridiculous Craigslist post, and a response from a good guy.

Beware of Northstar / Sierra pass organizers

"Several people on CL are trying to get you to sign up with them to form a group to buy a Northstar/Sierra season pass. Their service is probably legit, but they have a hidden agenda. The passes cost $439 each. The thing they are not telling you is that after they sign up 15 people, the organizer gets his pass absolutely FREE! Several people on CL are offering the exact same service for around $412 each. This is because they are kindly putting the 16th "FREE" ticket back into the group so the cost is divided by 16, not 15. I highly advise that you join a group that offers the pass for $412 and don't support the selfish people trying to score a free $439 pass at your expense. I don't like to see people profit at the expense of others, so this is why I'm taking the time to warn all of you."

In response to 'Beware of Northstar'

Could you be the socialist wussy I’ve been dreaming of on all these cold nights? I felt so warm and gushy when I read your posting. My fellow comrade, I think it only fair that I reciprocate some of that warm gushyness back to you.

I too am sickened by the concept of profits. Really though, what was that asshat thinking? Offering innocent strangers a nice savings of $37 on season passes to Northstar, in hopes of getting himself on to a few overpriced slopes this winter. What was he trying to do there? Identifying a profit, investing his time, taking a risk, offering strangers savings... God forbid he was a student or low income citizen. It makes me sick.

Like today, I saw these high school kids at McDonalds for lunch. Those selfish little runts realized that if they pooled their few dollars and split a 30 piece nuggets that they would each end up with 2 nuggets more than if they ordered four 6 piece meals. Think of those 6 extra battered and succulent little morsles of pulverized chicken carcase going unpaid for. I was so disgusted. What nerve!

I've heard of this great place I think we should elope and move to. It's called communist Russia. It's beautiful there. Lots of snow, dirt, poverty and politicians who share our passion. Actually, I'm selling 1-way passes from SFO to Moscow. They cost $439 each, but if you buy one from me they only cost $412! I only have to sell 15 more and then we can fall in love, move out of this capitalist shit hole and score sweet low paying jobs at the local shoe factory. I yearn to hold your hand and spill potato goolash all over my stained coveralls.

What's Craiglist?


Blogger Mattress said...

that's pretty funny especially the first one, she sounds very open and tolerant.

6:18 AM  
Blogger fetching jen said...

Yeah, open and tolerant only to liberal, pet allergic, vegan, man-hating women. She should have an easy time finding a roommate in San Francisco.

1:10 PM  

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